My Dear Friend,
You called today and I am so grateful I was able to answer as too often I’m not.
When I got to your door I saw a strong woman. A woman with a fighting spirit and a fierce ambition to be the master of all trades. I saw a woman I admire who has listless traits I’d love to emulate. I saw a woman who likes to live life with passion and rigour, not stand idly and watch it pass her by.
I saw a new vulnerability in you today. I saw a chink in your perfection that made you more beautiful, more admirable. I saw a woman struggling to reach the bar she sets so high, as well as find time to smell the roses on her way up.
We are nothing more than we choose to reveal, and today you revealed a new facet. A beautiful new dimension that reinforced your strength. It takes a strong woman to acknowledge that her balance is off. It takes a strong woman to cry and honestly profess that she’s losing herself. It takes an even stronger woman to know that it’s necessary to know who you are, and to nurture that amidst all the other things you’re nurturing. It takes a strong woman to realise that she is not defined by the roles she fills, by her labels. Rather that she is defined by her character. Her own unique essence. And that it’s this very essence that allows her to excel in each of her roles. This essence is valuable and if you feel it slipping away, you have to find a way to grab it, hang onto it and nurture it. If you don’t you become simply ‘okay’. And ‘okay’ just doesn’t cut it for someone as perfectly imperfect as you. Excellence is your only okay. And you’ll find it. You’ll go and get it because life isn’t what you want it to be without it.
I’m going to turn to two of my most helpful pieces of writing in an attempt to help you quiet your mind long enough to see a clear plan forward; Max Ehrmann’s Desiderata and the beginning of The Serenity Prayer.
Reading the Desiderata is cathartic. It gently and practically reminds me what I already know. It begins with a recognition that life is loud and fast, and ends with a reminder that my ultimate goal is happiness. Priceless validation. The Serenity Prayer, I’m sure you know it. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.” Again, a reminder. This time to not exhaust my efforts in vain. In times of stress and doubt these pieces seem to provide me with perspective, and subsequently hope. My hope now is that they may do the same for you.
Hang in there love and remember that your vulnerability, recognition of your fragility, makes you stronger than you ever knew you could be.